Dating no desire

14-Jun-2020 16:15

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And there's considerable evidence to suggest that exercise can be as good for combating depression as any antidepressant.

🔹 Be mindful: Even during your saddest periods, try to spot happy moments like a bird singing or a new flower blooming in your garden.

We don't know enough about the chemical changes that occur in the brain during depression and little research has been done on how these changes affect sex.

From a clinical point of view, however, it's clear that a depressive illness tends to affect all the bodily systems, dislocating them and often slowing them down.

If you are worried that cuddling will project you into full sex when you don't want it, just tell your partner that you're not feeling like having sex, but that you would really like to cuddle up. Touch and closeness can keep a relationship intact.

If your partner is the one who is suffering, try to remember the following:🔸 Be patient: Don't keep saying that you understand what your partner is going through. Instead say: 'I can't know exactly how you're feeling, but I am trying very hard to understand and help.'🔸 Don't take it personally: Try to remember that any loss of interest in sex is probably not personal, but connected with the illness.

Being around a depressed person is very draining, so make sure you look after yourself.

Have some time alone, or get out to a film or to see friends.

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Indeed, renewed interest in sex may be the first sign of recovery.

Nowadays, there are plenty of alternatives to antidepressants.

Cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT), for example, is becoming much more readily available on the NHS.

This effect is most marked with regard to sleep, which is invariably disrupted.

But there can be adverse effects on any activity that requires energy, spontaneity and good co-ordination – and that includes sex.

Walking not only gets you out in the fresh air, but, like other forms of exercise, it releases endorphins in the brain.